Kill Them With Kindness

Kill Them With Kindness

that's the advice my Snr Manager always gives to us when we're faced with difficult clients.. apparently, kindness is killin me..

sometimes it doesn't pay to be kind.. you give them love, they throw crap in your face.. what the hell am i toleratin that for..? at the end of the day, i'm cleanin up all those crap & for what..? nothin..! PRECISELY..! there's only so much i can take & i guess Lilian was right.. i have to control myself or it'll show.. that i did but i don't know for how long i'm able to hold on..

of late, i have death on my mind.. you know, how does it feel to die..? what happens after you die..? do they have books on how to die..? sometimes i wish i'm dead.. i find my presence to be of a nuisance & quite redundant i can say.. what am i here for..? it's not like my presence will or can make any difference to anyone, right..?

right..?

friends.. forever..?

friends.. forever..?

there is an unsettlin feelin that has been botherin me of late.. it just makes me feel so restless & unsure about things.. maybe it's just the guilts of the past that's out to haunt me, well at least i hope that's what they are..

i guess havin friends are not as simple as it seems.. it does take a lot of effort to build one & maintain it.. some just come & go into our lives but some remain throughout.. i have a feelin that one of it is breakin away from me.. gosh.. that's goin to be a tough one.. friends for the longest time & things change, just like that..

i'm yearnin to meet my ladies.. i wonder how they are right now.. i miss them so much..

**can't take it.. just wishin school's totally over, drivin's done, promotion's confirmed & big day's passed.. the anxiety of it all..! i think about all these everyday, 24/7 & it's gettin to me.. everythin's neither here nor there.. nothin is fixed.. bummer..