back.. to black..

remember the unsettlin feelin that i had about a month ago..? well it came back.. just as i thought i've put everythin aside & moved on, the feelin came back again.. i'm gettin bouts of restlessness & it's killin me.. it really is..

been thinkin of a million ways to get rid of this mad sentiment but nothin seems to work.. just got to live with it i guess..

on the bright side, we're gettin bits & pieces for the crib.. slow progress but gettin somewhere.. eventually.. anyone wants to volunteer to assist..? there's paintin, re-wirin, fixin.. you know, things of those sorts..

**i miss MY BESTIE.. very, very, very much...

mis-understood..?

finally today was the last trainin.. was a bit quiet though, probably because Cyn & Cher wasn't around..

i just hope what i was tryin to say durin the trainin didn't come across as rude or blunt because i really mean no disrespect.. what i really meant to say was that i love my original team members & i am sad that they had to be transferred else where BUT that doesn't mean that i dislike the current team i'm workin with.. i have a fabulous senior receptionist & [i quote from Sam] fantastic personal assistant on board Prudential so there shouldn't be any problem..

all i need is probably a little more time to adjust to this new team.. i mean i'm not a great office assistant myself, let alone being in this new personal assistant role & there is so much i have to learn from them.. my emotions were triggered the moment Anna mentioned about how Auds & Aida left for 6 Batt.. sorry, i couldn't help it..

**chin up

anyway, i met up with my Lady Bee & Herman last friday.. gosh i missed her SO MUCH..! really had lots of catchin up to do & apparently 4 hours was just not enough.. thank goodness she's only across the road from Prudential so now i have a potential lunch-mate..! can't believe how small this country is.. not only is Herman in a relationship with Bee, he's also Alexis' cousin..



can't wait to see her again.. Sayang, shall we do A7X concert with Bee & Herman..?

I'm lucky I'm in love with my best friend
Lucky to have been where I have been
Lucky to be coming home again
Lucky we're in love every way
Lucky to have stayed where we have stayed
Lucky to be coming home someday
- Lucky, Jason Mraz feat. Colbie Caillat

Ramadan

it has begun..

Selamat Berpuasa to all of you..

i'm losin weight & i'm gettin worried.. doesn't feel healthy, just doesn't feel right..

Kill Them With Kindness

Kill Them With Kindness

that's the advice my Snr Manager always gives to us when we're faced with difficult clients.. apparently, kindness is killin me..

sometimes it doesn't pay to be kind.. you give them love, they throw crap in your face.. what the hell am i toleratin that for..? at the end of the day, i'm cleanin up all those crap & for what..? nothin..! PRECISELY..! there's only so much i can take & i guess Lilian was right.. i have to control myself or it'll show.. that i did but i don't know for how long i'm able to hold on..

of late, i have death on my mind.. you know, how does it feel to die..? what happens after you die..? do they have books on how to die..? sometimes i wish i'm dead.. i find my presence to be of a nuisance & quite redundant i can say.. what am i here for..? it's not like my presence will or can make any difference to anyone, right..?

right..?

friends.. forever..?

friends.. forever..?

there is an unsettlin feelin that has been botherin me of late.. it just makes me feel so restless & unsure about things.. maybe it's just the guilts of the past that's out to haunt me, well at least i hope that's what they are..

i guess havin friends are not as simple as it seems.. it does take a lot of effort to build one & maintain it.. some just come & go into our lives but some remain throughout.. i have a feelin that one of it is breakin away from me.. gosh.. that's goin to be a tough one.. friends for the longest time & things change, just like that..

i'm yearnin to meet my ladies.. i wonder how they are right now.. i miss them so much..

**can't take it.. just wishin school's totally over, drivin's done, promotion's confirmed & big day's passed.. the anxiety of it all..! i think about all these everyday, 24/7 & it's gettin to me.. everythin's neither here nor there.. nothin is fixed.. bummer..

get-away

get-away

spent the weekend in Genting with my sis & the 2 'bodyguards'... got the bus on friday night & reached at about 5.30am.. groggy & sleepy, i stepped out of the bus only to find myself freezin to death..!



the theme park opens only at 8am so we spent the next 2½ hours checkin in our bags, walkin around to find somewhere warm to eat our already-cold "breakfast", wash up & queue for our entry wristbands for the theme park rides..! haha..!

we tried all the thriller rides 1st so as to avoid disappointment & thankfully we did because by noon people started streamin into the theme park & everyone was everywhere & i don't do well with crowds..

glad i had that short break.. really needed to clear my head & more importantly i had fun!

i am a disappointment

i am a disappointment

i let my best friend down.. i think she really hates me now.. i wish that i could make things right between us again..

she has been my bestest friend for the longest time, even longer than my fiance.. i never realized that i have been takin her for granted until the day she said, "Don't make me hate you." i knew she meant it but i was i coward.. i couldn't get myself to tell her the truth about that saturday.. she must be really disappointed & i know i don't deserve to be forgiven..

all the years we've been friends, i have always had the fullest respect for her.. she was more than a friend, she is like a sister to me; my family..

i haven't been able to do anythin right, thinkin of how much i must have hurt her.. things have never been the same eversince..

she's my maid-of-honour & i will not get that replaced by anyone else.. it's her or no one..

so if you have a best friend, never take him or her for granted because you'll never know when things will get out of hand & you may lose that friendship..

1 down, 2 more to go!

1 down, 2 more to go!

yeah..! completed my 1st module..! now on to the next round, the "road trip".. gotta work on my left & right bends & turnin... need help desperately...

received upsettin news of late.. my manager & my colleague is leavin the company... in fact, aNNiE's last day was today... didn't get the chance to say a proper goodbye to her... i'm goin to miss her so much...

so very much...

went to watch a movie few days back with SaV, AuD, CyN, cHeR, iNDa, FanGQi..



i SO LOVE the movie..! it's one of those movies that you'll always remember.. i might need to start looking for the series.. hahaha..! i don't believe it but i actually ACTUALLY cried like 4 or 5 times throughout the movie! it was THAT FANTASTIC..!

watchin the movie reminds me so much of my s|nGLeS_OuT ladies.. i don't know how to explain it but it really does.. gosh.. i really don't mind watchin it again though.. *hint hint* anyone up for SATC..?

breather

breather

so i'm now almost completin my module one BUT i've got to wait for at least another month before i can continue my lessons.. gosh.. i should have booked my lessons earlier.. i'm sproutin more grey hair because of this.. grrr.. well, at least i'm reachin somewhere rather than stay stagnant & procrastinate on continuin it.. 6 long years.. *sigh* what the heck was i thinkin..?

i've already gotten most of my stuffs so i'm left to call up a couple of places to confirm my bookings & such.. got to take note of a few dates like 9th July, 13th August & most importantly 10th January..

none compared...

none compared...

a first for me.. never really saw that comin.. unbelievable!

as promised, my 2nd prezzie from my Sayang



hahahaha..! he sent us away to Bintan..! just what i needed.. it was a pretty short trip & we didn't do much but we thoroughly enjoyed ourselves [& burnt a hole in our travellin pocket.. tsk.. tsk..]

you should have been there to witness Di's confusion with the rupiah currency.. 10 000Rp or 100 000Rp..? guess the number of zeros on the bill.. haha..! it's just so hilarious.. sorry Di.. i can't help it.. there's also the one where we saw a huge statue of a RHINOCEROS while in the bus to the resort.. she called it HIPPOPOTAMUS hehehe.. how about the petai crackers that we ate..? we didn't know it was petai until the front desk guy told us.. *YUCK..!* hahaha..! all in all, it has been a fabulous trip.. thank you besties..!

pictures comin up soon..!

once upon a time..

once upon a time..

i know this must be the longest time that i went M.I.A... right..? it's been SUPER exhaustin... a very tirin period for me... locatin venue, callin up here & there... it's never endin.. well, let's not go there...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME..!

hahaha... so thick skinned eh..? anyway, i had the best birthday ever..! 2 bashes at work, 2 prezzies from my Sayang.. what more can i ask for?

Up the Singapore Flyer for me BIRTHDAY..!


another prezzie's goin to be on the 3rd of May.. it's goin to be so fun..! haven't got the time to put up the prezzie pictures yet.. soon ok..?

dillusional impressions..

dillusional impressions..

Happy Chinese New Year to all my Chinese friends out there.. hope you had a great long holiday/weekend.. *smiles*

i am very disturbed with everythin that is going on around me.. infidelity? unconventional relationships?

who am i to question right? i'm just voicin out my concerns..

anyway, 7th was Aidil's weddin.. nothin much to comment on about it.. took a few pointers from the whole event though.. i roughly know what to work on & what to deal with when the time comes.. up to date, most of the stuffs have been semi-confirmed.. we just need to get the most important part of the whole "project" together or else nothin's goin to work..

went back to JB on friday & came back on saturday.. went with aZMaN & his 2 sisters.. i zonked out the moment we reached.. can't help it..! i woke up at 7am, met up with aZMaN, travelled down to Woodlands to pick up the girls & headed down to JB & finally reached there close to noon! so how..?

**good luck to us again, my dear..

Fish & Co.

Fish & Co.

as the name says..

i'm sure everyone had a fun time that night..one thing's for sure, i came home stoned & very, very full.. haha..!

**love you all..

because I we got high..

because I we got high..

i know i can survive on the floor if AuDReY is around.. read the followin conversation trail at your own risk..

Me: Babe, Ah Tong's voicemail is in Chinese..!
AuDReY: Really? What does it say?
Me (laughin): ...

yup, tell me about it..

i got high on my glass of water with a zest of lemon.. it's perky i tell you..! works wonders on me...

another new year..

another new year..

a warm welcome to 2008 & Happy New Year to all of you..!

i had a quiet celebration.. just the 2 of us & our coffee, away from everyone.. our very 1st New Year together after so many years.. what nicer way to usher in the new year if not in the arms of that someone you love?

this is goin to be the start of new challenges & opportunities for us.. nobody said that it's goin to be easy but we'll get it together.. i'm very sure of that.. one way or another..

**i'll be around..

little black shoes

little black shoes

i've always had a thing for black shiny pointy heels with ribbon but i never seemed to have any luck findin the right pair.. i've had this one for a month or so & i'm lovin it.. well, they may not look brand new [i walk around a lot.. it's my job..] but they are the pair that i've been searchin for..!

straight is..

straight is..

..& it rained

..& it rained

i'm on half day leave today.. have one of the assignments to finish & lectures to catch up on..

it rained heavily today just before lunch.. unfortunate events happened to me & it began with the bag..

Part I: i picked up some stuffs from 6 Batt Rd to bring over to Pru & as i was walkin back along the stretch of Raffles Place [outside Chevron House to be precise..] with YvoNNe Lu [she was goin for lunch, you see] the bag that i was carryin gave way & all the cans of Coke & Carrot Juice came tumblin down & rolled all over the place..! imagine the embarrassment that i was in..! thank goodness YvoNNe was with me or i could have sworn i'd cry.. 2 gentlemen came up & helped us pick up the drinks.. i stuffed them in the plastic bag that i had with me, hung the umbrella that YvoNNe gave me on my hand & walked quickly back to Pru..

[i'm not done yet..]

Part II: i left Prudential Tower only to find that it was still rainin heavily.. as usual, i don't have an umbrella with me [i don't like to carry one around] so i took the underpass to 55 Market Street & texted aZMaN at the same time, hopin that he'll get the message & rescue me from the rain.. it was busy at Geek i presume because he didn't reply so i stood at the traffic light junction at Republic Plaza II & prayed as hard as i could that the rain will subside.. well, it didn't so i stood there, resigned to my fate that i'll be stuck at the junction till eternity..![ok, so i exaggerated] & then..! an angel, a French angel to be exact, came to my rescue..! [*flutters eyelids & clasps hands*] he asked if i wanted to cross over to 55 Market Street & of course i said yes so he offered to share his umbrella with me.. aww.. sweet right..? his was a 1-man umbrella [you know, the small foldable one that you can tuck in your bag..] yet he offered to share.. such a nice guy.. *smiles*

& so the story ends with me partially wet with soggy stockings & squishy shoes..

**the end..

i'm not still a girl..

i'm not still a girl..

i'm goin to have my hair washed & blown for the X'mas party.. don't laugh..! at the end of the day, i'm still a girl afterall..

apparently me & Valerie [the new PA in Pru] are goin to be wearin the same top later.. what the..? well it's ok.. as i told her this mornin, we could go as twins or somethin.. haha.. corny eh..? so i decided not to wear the outfit that my sister's friend loan to me.. it's just too big.. i'm practically sweepin the floor as i walk & the top's hooks can be undone without me havin to do it myself.. it's that bad..

this month i'm very contented with my earnings.. yes, i jolly well earned it.. thanks to my colleagues for helpin me & aZMaN for his understandin.. *smiles*

right.. i'll be back with pictures.. till later..

to be or not to be..

to be or not to be..

this is it..

the countdown has started.. a year from now things are goin to take a turn.. plannin has started & i don't know how to describe the feelin.. anxiety? excitement? frustration? probably a mix of everythin..

it's a whole different take now.. i came back from holiday feelin refreshed but gradually it worn off & now it's back to square one.. feelin the tension of work again..

next week thursday's our X'mas Party & did i mention to you that the theme's "Bollywood"? thanks to my sister & her reliable contacts & resources, she managed to get a loan for me for the costume.. one of her colleagues has a suit that she's worn once & it comes with accessories as well so good for me.. haha.. i'll try to keep in mind to put up pictures of the party..

**good luck