happiness


it's funny how this one life works.. seems like there is always the unhappy aura surroundin it.. no matter how much this one tries to make her life change for happiness, it's bound to turn uneventful.. "What went wrong?" you may ask.. i ask myself that everytime too.. i will be lyin if i say that i have never experienced happiness. i did but it's like when you are struck with a headache & you try to ease it with aspirin [or whatever that helps for that matter] but they only provide a temporary relief.. it's endless i tell you..!

i've said it once [or twice] & i shall say it again.. "For once..! Let me just stay happy..! Is it so much to ask for?" really..! i only want HAPPINESS..

for now i'm contented that i still have my family, my job (not career though) & some of my friends who are willin to go through this phase with me.. one of these days, i'm going to die of a broken heart i tell you.. at the rate these guys are goin, breakin my heart, i'm going to die young [& beautiful too hopefully..] there's nothin i want more in this life, at this age, than happiness for my love life..

Once again i apologize to those guys i've hurt in the past.. i seriously have no intention whatsoever to play around with your feelings.. maybe this is what they call KARMA; 'What Goes Around, Comes Around'..

my answers? no answers..


s|zzy dear.. we shall meet up one of these days.. don't worry i won't tell aYuNe.. khehehe~

anyway, i've started workin @ O'Briens as some of you may already know.. i started on the 13th of Feb.. i'm just glad i have a job for now to help me tide things over.. i'm also happy that most things are fallin into places nicely for me.. like what aZMaN always say, 'give yourself a break.. you jolly well need it..' somehow i have to agree with him.. love you sweetie..

i'm still waitin for some pictures from aLeXis from last week Friday but for now here's some pics for the time being.. btw, i had to remove the 'stamp' pic of aZMaN.. apparently, he says it's for personal viewin.. khehehe..

what happened?


sorry been away... partly because was grounded by my BaBa.. khehehe~ as promised, i will try to give as much details as possible..

aZMaN's a very, very good friend of mine & we got to know each other a couple of years back.. if i'm not mistaken somewhere in 2001 or 2002.. he was always there to lend a listenin ear & a shoulder to cry on.. at one point, we were both attached & our companions were sceptical about our friendship so we drifted & disappeared.. 2 years later, we bumped into each other [& that was somewhere nearin the end on Jan] & took us 2 weeks to finally meet up to catch up on times.. that was the beginnin of a crazy, crazy week.. in fact, it is still crazy up till now..

we met, had dinner @ Cafe Iguana, couple of margaritas & he got me up the G-Max..! ahahaha..! the view was breathtakin from up there, suspended in that thing.. could see the S'pore River & some parts of Clake Quay.. wow..! you guys should try.. had coffee & witness a firework display.. we met up subsequently the next day for b'fast & he surprised me with 'Memoirs of a Geisha' [though i've already watched it..] the next few days, we met up for dinner & stuffs like that & we enjoy each & every moment of it..

i'm not a Valentine's Day person & never had celebrated Valentine's Day but 3 days ago, i discovered that aZMaN shares the same passion for poetry & arts like i do & we made plans to so-called celebrate the V-day via the unconventional way.. we went to the Singapore Philatelic Museum [FYI: it's a stamp museum] & then to The Substation for the 3rd SSFF [it's a short film thingy..]

why i say it still is crazy? well, eventhough we still hold the friendship that we had a couple of years ago, we kind of brought that to another level.. a higher level, that is.. we discovered each other's feelings ONLY of late.. but the thing is, we've being keepin it from each other for the past 2 years, fearin that it will ruin the friendship..

maybe it is worth going through all those crappy times.. havin him now in my life is like an answered prayer..

WooHoo..!


i had a crazy fun time yesterday.. i went for an interview at The Coffee Club & after the interview, i got the job.. details later.. i'm rushin for time.. went to O'Brien's to meet my friends & the kindda got me my old job back.. yes ar..!

the crazy fun time was with aZMaN.. like i said i'll detail later.. i just had to put it in my blog now before i forget.. later guys.. i'm off to school.. shit i'm late..!

menulis dalam bahasa ku..


jangan di tanya.. tiba-tiba jer terasa macam nak kena tulis dalam bahasa melayu.. mungkin berpunca [cey.. berpunca sey..!] dari blog teman-teman tertentu yang suka tulis blog mereka macam gini.. ini yang dikatakan pengaruh..

aku terharu sekali bila aku terbaca satu blog ni.. terpampang wajah aku yang "jelita" ni di muka depan blog tersebut.. terperanjat sekejap aku dibuatnya.. dah tu pulak ada storyline disebalik gambar tu..! bukan apa.. aku baru saja digelar temanwanita kepada seorang daripada teman mereka jadi kita dah jadi coverstory untuk blog tu.. terima kasih semua.. buat susah ajer letak gambar ni semua.. dah gitu takper, diberinya aku nama baru..! takper.. no matter what, aku tetap DeE..!

it may come as a shock to some of my friends but this is what i have choosen.. this is my decision.. don't ask..

lagi satu perkara yang aku hairan.. kenapa si NeLL tu perasan tak habis-habis eh? aper segala yang aku buat semuanya tak kena dengan dia.. i'm sure you guys will say buat bodoh sudah & memang aku buat bodoh tapi menyakitkan hati tau kadang-kadang.. macam semalam.. aku tukar tag MSN aku sebab sHaM degil.. dah degil takper, tiba-tiba jadi gila..! kebetulan, si NeLL pon log in.. dia baca tag aku, dia pon feeling-feeling lah yang aku nak kena kan dia.. padahal, aku ajukan tu semua buat sHaM.. tak tau malu eh? bila aku main lagu I'm Back at On D' Radio dia kata aku sengaja nak sakitkan hati dia lah, aku nak kenakan dia lah.. dia fikir aku banyak masa nak buat kerja-kerja bodoh ni? GROW UP LAH NELL..! GET A LIFE..!

oklah.. sekejap lagi aku nak keluar, nak pergi interview.. harap-harap dapat kerja.. tak suka lah duduk rumah hari-hari kena bising.. lagipon aku nak jumpa kawan lama favourite aku..! aZMaN..! lama sey tak jumpa dia.. ada baik nya aku keluar sekarang.. nanti lambat pulak..

macam-macam happenin..


020206
one of the most enjoyable days i've had lately.. it still felt the same like how it was 3 years ago.. just the 4 of us.. crappin, laughin and most importantly enjoyin each other's company.. thank you s|z, FFiZ & FiE for reminicin the gd old times.. pictures will be up soon.. ouh btw, check out s|z's blog for more of the karaoke pics..

my favourite Levis 599 is torn..! my comfort jeans.. my companion.. *SiGh* now i need to find a new somethin for solace..

alright, back to work/school people..


lucky for me.. my class is tmr.. khehehe~ so that's an extra day off for me..

HAPPY 22nd BIRTHDAY TO MY DARLIN' COUZ..! *SiGh* THE cousin.. yeah.. the one with 1 kid & another on the way.. the one who got MARRIED before i did.. khehehe~ well, i still love you NaNDa.. MARRIED or not..

anyway, it's so contradictin.. i sent out a notice to all my On D' Radio crew informin them that i won't be able to go on air for abt 2 weeks but i HAVE been on air yesterday & the day before..! ahahaha..! can't help it.. i miss dj-ing & i feel that yesterday was the best so far.. RuSHy was on air from 8.00 - 9.30, i took over from 10.00 - 12.00 & then iDHaM took over from 1.00 - 2.30.. On D' Radio: 7 1/2 hrs non-stop..! wOw..! i loved it..!



i can't wait for tmr..! i have a DATE with my BaBy GerL, FFiZ & FiE.. don't know if it's gonna be just like old times but however it's gonna be, i am so lookin foward for tmr..!

hhmmm.. just a quick UPDATE for the friends who are curious abt what's goin on between me & my teman baru.. we are just friends.. JUST FRIENDS..! period. fullstop. no dates whatsoever, no hogging on the phone late at night & aper-aper lagi yg you all fikirkan.. ok? *SmiLeZ*